Smokebomb
A rare neutral Mechanoid in the ongoing Arbitrary Autobot-Customercon war, Smokebomb is a cryptic and enigmatic figure. The sometime arch-nemesis of Ultra Zogamus, Smokebomb travels the galaxy dealing in death and destruction through taking the most absurd approach possible. In his most apparent profession, Smokebomb deals in Death Sticks (Where Death Sticks are little pieces of plant by-product wrapped in paper. People stick them in their mouths and set them on fire for recreational purposes). However, the sale and trade of Death Sticks are highly regulated by intergalactic convention, so he cannot sell them directly, nor can he actually advertise them. So instead, he gets other people to sell them for him, and lets them take the responsibility for selling an unsellable product instead. And once he has gotten past this hurdle, the next stage of his master plan begins. When he is not selling Death Sticks, Smokebomb is a bounty hunter. However, much like his method of selling Death Sticks, his approach to bounty hunting is overly complicated and unorthodox. Smokebomb does not directly hunt his target himself, nor will he attempt to take them down with his own weaponry. Rather, his plan is for them to take up Death Sticks. Once they do so, all he has to do is wait. Sooner or later, the target will drop dead of Death Stick related illness. Either that, or they go bankrupt, given that a pack of Death Sticks presently costs about as much as the GDP of a third world nation. Once they die of whatever reason, he swoops down, takes their stuff and claims the bounty on their head. In the off-chance that they don’t, Smokebomb takes his share of the sales anyway. Despite this odd approach, he has become the most successful Bounty Hunter in all of space. Which suggests that either his approach works, or every other Bounty Hunter is just really bad at what they do. As the Arbitrary Autobots’ chief Customercon Wrangler, Ultra Zogamus has to deal with all matters related to the purchase and distribution of Death Sticks. Needless to say, Smokebomb’s absurdist approach and cryptic marketing plan makes this incredibly frustrating and as such, the two are arch-enemies or something. Capabilities Smokebomb is armed with a deadly combination of absurd space logic and sight unseen marketing schemes that are tailored to make people want to not only stick things in their mouths and set them on fire, but also to be willing to pay a huge sum of money to do such. His arguments make no sense and his position is largely indefensible, but people still do such anyway. Clearly he’s doing something right, but nobody knows what. For those rare moments that he needs to engage somebody directly, Smokebomb is armed with a pair of shoulder mounted Vaping Cannons. The actual effects of these weapons are unknown and their functions are poorly understood, but Smokebomb insists that they are harmless, even when shooting somebody with them. If he needs to retreat, he can generate clouds of second-hand smoke to cover his escape. As a bounty hunter, he naturally has a Too Sweet Spaceship, the Flavour Country. Category:Characters Category:Males Category:Bounty Hunters Category:Bored Fish Era Category:Articles by Darthfish